I'm really troubled by the idea that you need a "right" to be a mother. You are a mother, it's a biological fact.When I replied with "Biology does not a mother make," the Twitterer wrote:
Yes it does. Check you biology text.I think some of the links on yesterday's post (which was not up yet when this exchange took place) kind of prove my point.
But I see the root of the problem: we use one word to talk about two things that can be entirely different.
In Spanish, the word "aborto" refers to both an (elective) abortion and a miscarriage (spontaneous abortion). This infuriates me, because the two are ENTIRELY DIFFERENT THINGS. (If this is not inherently obvious to you, then I'll go into the details when I write about when "life" begins.) We have the same problem here, with the word "mother."
Having the necessary working parts and possessing the ability to pop a baby out doesn't make you a mother. Yes, it makes you a biological mother, but it doesn't make you a mother.
Loving and nurturing that baby makes you a mother.
The girls in those links had the necessary biology. Would you call them "mothers"?
Limiting "motherhood" to something as simple and vacant as biology is also horrendously insulting to mothers who adopt. I'd like to see anyone go up to an adoptive mother and tell her she's not a mother simply because the child didn't come out of her own vagina.
Motherhood is a huge undertaking. It is the most important job in the world. Seriously. It is the beginning of everything.
And, unfortunately, too many people out there are doing an amazing job of screwing it up.
The influence a parent has over her child is immeasurable. (And, in my opinion, underestimated.) I seriously believe we could solve all the problems of the world if we found a way to give everyone caring, loving, nurturing parents.
Motherhood (and fatherhood; don't want to leave them out) is a huge undertaking. It is a huge responsibility. One that should be entered into when one is ready to do so.
Not something that you're stuck with because the condom broke or you missed your pill one day. Because that's just not fair to the child.